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soledade
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Name: Sarah
Country: United States
State: California
Birthday: 4/15/1986
Gender: Female
Interests: converstations that make you uncomfortable in your skin and your mind expand, art in all forms (that stimluates any one or more of the senses. ) Rockclimbing(bouldering), spanish, psychology, people are absolutly facinatiing, anything with outside- i love that place, rain or shine. travelling. books. comfortable clothes, and colors.
Expertise: I am expert barista. i am expert changalita loca
Occupation: Student
Industry: Education/Research
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  itleads2trouble
Member Since:
5/27/2003
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| For my birthday on April 15th I gave myself the gift of pursuing my dream. I bought 100 dollars worth of seeds, seedling greenhouses, and sure start soil. I was going to grow my own food. no one told me that "sure start" would not infact be a sure start but rather was a fertilizer to be added to soil. the first round of seeds were burned. fried.
ok. so I then went out and spent the time to re plant a new round of seeds and invest in another kind of soil.
I didnt have my own space for a garden and so casey's front yard became the borrowed space that would allow my gardening dream to come true. watering and watching a little over a week passed and sprouts came up. it was magical. few times in my life had I been so proud, so excited. as if i had done something, the seedlings grew and grew in their happy little pods in a controlled environment.
It was time to get their roots into the ground- we ripped out the cheap landscaping in the front yard, broke up the dirt and transplant the seedings- with out enough space many of the seedlings had to go to other home, where land, water and space was available. these were either forgetten, taken out by dogs, or eaten by local wild life.
shortly I left on a trip leaving casey and my other fellow gardener in charge of the "garden"= 8 bean plants, some tomatoes, eggplants, squash strawberries, peppers, potates and herbs.
the beans thrived, but were left on the vine till the seeds hardened and needed to be soaked and cooked like dry beans. the squash produced one fruit I accidentally kicked it off before it was ripe. the eggplants suffered root rot in small containers till they were replanted 3 months later when I got home, only to be put into poor soil, to flower and not fruit.
of the 8 tomatoe plants a few have finally began to bear fruit, but only after most have died.
the peppers produced maybe- 4 peppers... total all summer.
So what went wrong?
twice of late i was visiting friends- each time a man hole ( a home in which many young men live). with little care reverence or intent each had an abundance of produce to show for minimal effort in their gardens. each time I thought I should surely lay down my dream.
so what went wrong? I was living on bad soil. soil not like clay, soil that is clay, acidic, low in nutrients. soil which requires great amounts attention and amendments to become fruitful, soil that is so poor one must be able to pay to make it gardening soil, which I was not able to do.
My dad told me that as long as I loved something and tried my hardest I could have my dreams, I could be anything I wanted to be. and he's still right. but its a hell of a lot easier for the person whos living on rich soil.
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| after reading an article " my year with out money" http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2009/nov/09/mark-boyle-money I felt myself desire, as I have before, to seek out ways to minimize expenditures. As I have reduced my expenditures to little more then food, this was where I had to begin. this will include, gardening, and dumpster diving, as well as a shift in the kinds of food I eat. As i have become more health conscious and passionate about food the types of food I consume became more and more costly. For, instance, do I need to cook my food in 11 dollar coconut oil? or only use 15 dollar raw honey to sweeten?? In the land of plenty- how long could I live off excess?
while working at trader joes- in the evening I would throw out 1-3 shopping carts full of fresh produce. at three am I would restock the meat shelves and be lucky to throw a way anything less then 2 carts full. the avg. american household throws away 30 % of their food. we've all heard the stastics- but how do we get the excess of the wealth, the wasteful, into the mouths of the hungry and needy? or into my mouth?
today- smoothy - soy milk, bananas, strawberries, kefir- all dumpster dived.(free)
speghetti- catering left-overs free
pizza left overs z-pizza- free
coffee downtown- 4 dollars
after two days of dumpster diving there was more food then could be eaten be a group of friends and so distribution was neccisary. and where else but the barrio? off mlk blvd?
how long can this continue? watch for daily updates.
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| Many of us never meant to become farmers. We had our ambitions to enter the world as accountants or lawyers or teachers or some other clean, respectable professional. We never really thought about the origins of our food; we always knew that the supermarket shelves would fill themselves, food came in boxes or cans ready to serve and farmers were simply one dimensional photographs in the mix of a hot new marketing campaign. Farming was at best some idyllic retirement scheme, never a seriously considered career possibility. 
But then something happened. In the previously steady route of our lives, a shift occurred. The soil moved under us somehow, got stuck in the creases of our pants, in the ridges of our shoes, in the lines of our palms. Suddenly white picket fences, situation comedies and mutual fund returns didn’t seem so interesting anymore. The big ball game and the driving range became distractions from the reality of a new love affair. We got hooked on the possibilities of growing our own food and also providing that food to others. 
The epiphany was likely different for many of us. Maybe a friend took us to a farmers market. Maybe someone had a plate of local hamburgers or collards at a picnic. Maybe the news of some global food disaster made us question the monocultures piled high on our plates. Maybe a real life farmer entered our life. 
For a few of us, those with farming in our past – a childhood spent in the fields of the big farms or the family plots, throwing rocks into the hedgerows for little or no pay or watching over milking machines in the stench of industrial sized barns – there was no love, no kind of encouragement, no appreciation for our part in the dynamics of food production. We were simply limbs and calluses then, small gears in a giant cranking clock. We left the farm to pursue something else only to be pulled back hard when it became apparent that we could abandon everything that farming once meant to us. We could make it ours. 
Still others came to farming from DIY and anti-authoritarian backgrounds, building urban community gardens or putting up food in anarchist collectives. Gardening always had a community aspect to it, but we wanted something more. We knew that we could do the work, that we had the right vision and skills. We just needed the access and the resources to get started. Regardless of how we arrived at this point, here we are; we will call ourselves farmers from now on. 
Our new loves – with their sharp hooves and unfamiliar odors, bright green leaves and bee covered flowers – give all the confidence to continue and pursue every goal we can imagine. Our new hates – hail, crop failures and rain on market days – fully test our tolerance and keep those same goals in the territory of attainability. Throughout all the highs and lows we can look at ourselves over and over again knowing that, if we stick to our ideals, we can do noble and appropriate work no matter what happens. 
Local and sustainable farmers are our peers and our heroes, the most supportive, loving and steadfast community we could ever hope for. 
We young and new farmers have the opportunity to change the features of the agricultural systems we have come to inherit. Through the way we speak, act and work we can change the old infrastructure, market by market and county by county. We have the time and ability to influence extension agents, educational systems and other institutions to make them function the way we need them to function in order to attain a sane and purposeful community based food system.
We are the new blood in the old body. | | |
| What happens to a dream deferred? Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet? Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load. Or does it explode? -Langston Hughes
If You have followed my blog it may come as no surprise that this poem sits by my bed My father drilled the quote
Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them. --Henry David Thoreau
thematic. haunting.
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| The Infinite Creative Dialog
Is the Conversation of life. It seems easiest to grasp when considering God, and the conversations that come up about life with him. If intimacy with God was perfected, that the result would be an Infinite Creative Dialog. It is the most fulfilling conversation. Like afternoons the fade into the late night, and the dialog never breaks. brilliant ideas and deep emotions surge forth, Creation and Healing are the by-products.
I feel like this conversation, can occur on a much broader spectrum. I feel it when I am exploring a new place, getting to know someone, learning something new, or experiencing something everyday for the fourth year. a deep moving current, that initiates and responds. shaping our life, while letting us take part in the shaping.
It is a divine conversations. something that I have valued and held sacred for a long time. I like my conversation,
Between Myself and Life
To be married, is to invite someone into your conversation for the rest of your life. We all know that dynamics change based on who participates in a dialog. Add one person, and the whole conversation shifts.
So as we choose our Life partners, ( for those of us who haven't yet) We must consider how this individual will contribute, shape, or take from the sacred conversation.
I guess I'm writing about this, because I am being called out on my commitment issues.
I am asking myself,
" Why do you hesitate?"
I have also been one to travel light, move quickly, with the illusion( or reality) that I am free.
I've always said, " It takes twice as long to take someone with you"
Having a significant other makes it a little harder to sneak in, escape, go unnoticed.
Its more weight for one being hospitable.
Additionally-Ideally, two would share an agenda, Ive had one love where I thought we completely shared an agenda/ life goals, He was the only person I'd ever said I marry,
my reasoning, "If you dropped us off in the some strange city, foreign land or Island, we'd find the same friends, want to do the same things... we would drink from the same well and eat from the same trees.
I foresaw no major compromises.
Is that why you marry someone?
of course there will be compromises. foreseen and unforeseen. I guess I wanted to begin with as little of those as possible.
so my hesitation with Casey lies here. I don't feel like I would have to do any compromising with casey, I feel like I am the only one with an agenda. While I know that can't be true
---- Community
---- Loving the Broken
---- Sustainability
---- Family, Play
We share these. Maybe that's all that matters.
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It seems life everyone is getting married these days. It difficult not to sit around analyzing it.
some of you read what I had to say after I got back from my road trip, and if not, refer to a few posts back, " to make us more holy"
As I began to consider the simplicity of that, that marriage is simply a divine relationship and through it God makes us more holy, if we remain pliable, humble and god-fearing.
It made choosing a mate less dramatic.
Discussing it with bob over the counter at viento this morning , he said " Its a lot more complicated now, there's a lot more distraction." hes right.
And maybe this is the part where I was born a 100 years too late. He reference that a little more the 70 years ago, the extent of life was bearing children, putting food on the table, and if you were lucky having some pleasure in the process.
This is why I feel it is some important to become "narrow-minded". to become focused and intentional, so that marriage can be simple, so that it can be the pursuit of one or two primary goals.
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